My whole life, I always wanted two kids, a girl and then a boy. I wanted to have my first child by 26 and my second by 29 and be done before thirty. HA HA HA!!! My mom quotes John Lennon (?) to me: "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans." Anyway, I'm halfway to my dream family, with my amazing daughter, and though she's still little, I am thinking a lot about the future second child. Life changed so much when Karina was born, for the better. I know, because of my friends who have kids, that the second one is going to change life even more. But that's not my real issue.
My issue is that I love spending my time 100% with Karina. I know that once there's another baby, I won't be able to devote myself to her completely like I do now. And I know, intellectually, that this is a good thing for us, and will help her become independent, learn to share, etc. But oh how my heart aches thinking of sharing myself with another child!! Even though I know, intellectually, that I will love that new baby just as much as I love Karina...emotionally I can't grasp it.
I feel kind of silly thinking about this so much, but I'm 34 and time's a bit short for me.
7 comments:
That's how I felt too and it lasted for a few months after my second was born. Gradually, it worked itself out.
Thanks, blueviolet. I'm sure it will. It's the thinking about it ahead of time that's bad. :-)
so, is a new baby on the way?
Laura, there is definitely no new baby on the way! I will post when that happens some day. We aren't planning to have another one for at least several more months. I would say the earliest possible time would be fall (to get pregnant) but more likely around next spring or summer.
Only god know what is best for you. So if god wants you to have a child later on in life that is what you get. With me it was earlier and it freaked me out at first. Now I wouldn't have it any other way.
After Thing One was born, I felt the exact same way. I had always dreamed of having two kids, but I was just so content with one. I didn't want to share myself with another one.
When I found out that I was pg with Thing Two I was so freaked out the whole time. I knew that I would love her just as much, but was worried about how Thing One would feel, and like I said, just didn't want to share myself with another one.
As soon as she was born though, and as soon as Thing One held her and cried for them to "Give me (him)back my (his) baby" when the drs took her away I never felt upset about sharing myself again. :-)
....Except for when I have one hanging on this leg, and one hanging on my back, and the Hubster trying to talk to me. Then I don't want to share myself with ANYONE! I want to lock myself in a room somewhere! :-P JK... kinda!! :-D
Thanks, ladies. I think my mind is opening a little, but I'm still not ready.
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